You don’t want therapy.

You want what you signed up for
when your girlfriend moved in!

Instead of pressure, you want pleasure.

But if she’s like: “we need to talk.”

And you’re like: “we just did!”

It can’t last.

Whether you’re still together, or broken up,

talking about talking
can feel circuitous
like a trap.

Conversation shouldn't be stressful

You're a Lover,
Not a Fighter

How to avoid arguments without avoiding your girlfriend?

It’s scary when trust, love, and connection suddenly feel unreliable.

It can make you want to throw in the towel,
rather than play the blame-game.

Your natural inclination to
“just be chill and everything will be alright,”
might get you misinterpreted as being
“distant,” “distracted,” or uncaring.

Oof!

It’s hard to argue that

you do hear her,
she does affect you, and
you are taking action,

without ending up with all the blame and responsibility.

Where can you catch your breath and regroup?

If she’s proposing couples counseling,
I bet she has no idea what that implies.

No clue.

She probably thinks it’d be a big relief for both of you.

She doesn’t know that, for you,

hiring help might feel like having to perform
“in front of a live audience”
— an audience whose Ph.D. you’re paying for.

You don’t need to pay someone to get you to

apologize,
repeat that you love her every time she’s upset, or
dissect stuff that feels intangible–

AS IF YOU HADN’T TRIED THAT YET.

NO, THANKS!

Just because there are people earning money teaching “relationship skills,”
doesn’t mean you want to learn from so-called ‘experts.’

What happened to natural learning through osmosis?

If you want love to just flow naturally,
being told things can improve
is like sudden death.

Being natural and authentic is vital, central, and core to your life ethic,
so hiring (potentially unhelpful) ‘help’ is awfully

risky,
expensive, and
anxiety-provoking
(which jinxes it bigtime.)

At some level, it might even feel like cheating at natural selection.

Again:

If love is only real while it flows naturally and abundantly
without community,
without mentorship,
then the mere idea of support is offensive
and ultra stressful.

If your girlfriend, mom, sister, or best buddy
is suggesting you pay for help,
she’s probably unaware that
free support in small doses
(or even just proximal warmth)
would be much wiser for you.

Very probably, she grossly underestimates what she’s asking of you.

I illustrate that fact in this un-course, which I offer here,

Free of charge.

Why call it an un-course?

It’s independent research:

Open-ended prompts leave you free to choose
where/how you get your information.
Stimulating questions without right/wrong answers
support you in articulating yourself.

I celebrate independent thinking.

You might want to call it “a course on the perils of transformation,”
so you can honestly say you enrolled in a course about transformation.

The world won’t change from one little course,
but that might be a good thing.
And… it’s proof you’re doing something.

Surely therapy isn't
the only kind of support out there...

Many couples therapists recommend
that both partners also each hire your own
one-on-one support-person.

If you’d rather not have to pay for all those experts,
session-by-session,
indefinitely…

If you have little hope for real, tangible, lasting,
empowering relief,

…I invite you to read on.

If you’ve ever wished for a quick-and-painless,
lecture-free, fascinating,
brilliance-unleashing non-therapy
designed by and for the Sherlock Holmes’ of the real world…

but assumed that option doesn’t exist…

This is your lucky day.

Even if you’re so averse to talking about emotions
that you’d rather describe objects’
relative speed and position in space and time,

you’ll love my approach for tapping your own inner knowing,
because it helps you make more useful hypotheses and more accurate sense of your and others’ chemistry.

Hi, I’m Bree.

Almost 20 years ago, I met a brilliant non-therapist who proved that anyone willing to answer some scientific questions about the experience of what it’s like to be themselves in difficult situations, gained access to depths of inner wisdom usually ascribed to people with decades of ‘spiritual practice.’

Everyone who’s ever worked with me, also, has either had, or been able to regain, intrinsic health:

a sense of an inside, an outside, and an intelligent, permeable membrane between those,
as well as
a sense of intrinsic desire, an accurate read on reality, and ways to let those meet on many levels at once.

When I learned this approach, I worked in cancer and immunology research, myself, and was so extremely averse to any trace of manipulation (still am) that this highly trustworthy, non-manipulative approach was probably the only way I could have accepted support: as one scientist challenging and assisting another in the quest for truth.

I am uniquely equipped to support fellow skeptics who want to remain skeptical.

I’m a humanist. This license I got to protect your privacy is as religious as I get.
I took Level 1 IFS training to join a somewhat relevant community of practice without having to become a therapist myself.
Instead of hierarchical supervision, I’ve organized peer intervision and I actively incorporate client feedback gathered through routine quality control calls.

I refrain from certain behaviors therapists may legally do, e.g. talk about the past, or influence clients in a vulnerable state of mind — I don’t need to.

With my support, you have all the brilliant insights yourself.

I just help you measure the evidence.

I don’t do
‘behavioral change.’

I’m no therapist or social worker.
No ‘changing core beliefs.’
No affirmations.

I’m not a trainer, either:
no rehearsing in front of the mirror.
No ‘tips and tricks.’

My approach is highly effective because
it requires zero faith.
It’s not cognitive, nor behavioral, nor hypnotic.

Your system is wiser
than anyone who might manipulate it…

The changes that follow are truly optional:

You can choose to be more yourself,
more capable, and
more free than ever,

and yet,

you can also consciously opt for your habitual response,
if that’s what’s wisest in any given situation.

You’re truly adding options… without losing anything.

Being around people could suddenly become
far more interesting and rewarding…

That’d make life a lot less baffling, tedious, and scary…
It’d make all your goals easier to reach…
You could stop stressing about how exactly to
“just be yourself.”

I help technically inclined guys use existing strengths to unleash new ones from within.

Here's how I work: +

We start with a chronological description of your first-hand experience of what happens to you, that you don’t like.

For example:
“When I get a woman’s number, I can’t bring myself to call it.”
“When my girlfriend’s mood suddenly changes, I’m baffled.”
“As soon as I get home, she’s talking — I’ve barely arrived!” or
“Whenever I socialize, it takes me DAYS to recover.”

Then I ask for whatever specific, technical details you can remember
from your first-hand experience,
in manipulation-free, predictable ways,
so you can focus on sensing your way through the same questions every time.

(You know it’s working because, at first,
the bad feeling actually starts to happen to you again, just a little bit.)
Except this time…

For the first time,
you're not helpless.

A mystery you’ve been trying to solve on your own for decades, unravels:
the “mood-bomb” you’ve been trying to tip-toe around
proves to indeed have been dormant and hidden,
forever lying in wait…

Always looking for its chance to detonate…

But this time, you have the exact kind of
neutral, scientific, exploratory attitude
and bomb-dismantling support you’ve needed

(instead of the usual, 100% understandable frustration.)

Now it can stop endangering your peace of mind!

All you have to do
is answer the same questions about your first-hand experience
in a different order…
this time answering what you’d RATHER experience,
carefully toggling only one data-point — one dimension — at a time.

THIS CHANGES EVERYTHING.
LITERALLY.

If you take the whole next day after our daylong sessions,
and you truly relax and take care of yourself that day
transcribing the essence of your 9 Big Insights,
and
if you spend 5 painless minutes pouring over our notes every day for 9 weeks,
you’ll notice everywhere:

You’ve stopped fighting yourself.

With this inner cease-fire,
you taste what it’s like
to be your best, deepest self.

Best of all,
— and this is highly paradoxical —
the real-life situations that used to “set you off”
start to actually grant you access
to a calm, collected mindset.

You recognize who you’ve always been inside,
shining through.

Life is less like a minefield
when there’s no more mood-bombs
beneath the surface.

$ 780 Satisfaction guaranteed, or your money back.

Within just 48 hours:
Map your pain.
Melt it away.
Choose your own metrics. Start noticing change.
To help you dismantle a mood-bomb, you receive:
Immediate access to a system for direct-messaging me.
Prepwork to reassure you that this won't wreck your life's delicate balance.
Two free meetings to address your qualms and questions.
All for free.

Once you pay, you also get:
A care package via snail mail.
A thumbdrive to record our Zoom meetings on.
Two and a half days of my undivided attention.
Nine weeks of after-care calls on a bespoke cadence.
An app for integrating your 9 Big Discoveries in just 5 minutes/day.
Measurable improvement in your quality of life.
My 100% satisfaction guarantee on a specific result we define together before we even begin.

Will be
$990 in 2025

Thank you for offering such a valuable resource.

I'm very happy with how you assisted me with such positive change that has made a huge difference in my outlook and my ability to relax, be more content, and happy.

If someone were, like me, never able to have big groups of friends, tried Adderall, alcohol, and all kinds of therapy, but wasn't able to talk much or give the therapist much to work with, I'd recommend working with you.

My big "aha" moment was that it's the war with yourself that's damaging. You showed me my neuroplasticity. What we did in one weekend now allows me to pay a lot more attention to upset, fear, and other fight/flight reactions.

Since then, I've been able to be more comfortable with myself, and not bring myself down.

For a decade, I did not have close personal relations. It was like:

‘I don’t care! This is hopeless! Forget it!’

Well, it was a Hail Mary pass, but
this has been the HUGEST turn-around!

I’m such an introvert that people usually exhaust me. But it’s different with you.

With most people, I’m ready for a nap after about 10 minutes of conversation.
But an hour with you goes by so fast I don’t even notice time passing.

You’re funny, smart and wise, and so easy to talk to that I’m energized and not exhausted,
even when we talk about my least favourite topic: me!

I’m a big-bandwidth person, and so
I’m often afraid of overwhelming people.

What I appreciate about you, Bree, is that you are “big enough.”
I feel like I can be met by you.
You can meet me.

I can be as big, or as much, of “me” as I need to be, and you can meet me.

I don’t have to be nervous about “OMG, I have to say only 10% of who I am” for fear of overwhelming you.

I love talking with Bree. We’re very different people
– I’m introverted, shy, and sometimes shut down, and she can be very outgoing and outspoken –
and
she consistently meets our differences by communicating transparently about her own experience, inviting me to give her feedback and adapting to it, and actively and compassionately seeking to understand my experience.

Our meetings have provided me a rare opportunity to experimentally speak my full truth, which has been valuable practice that I have seen enrich my other relationships. It’s been a pleasure to learn and grow with her.

Bree, I offer tremendous thanks.

This book would not have happened without you.

I've had many past lives, but you...
You're from the future.

Your approach impressed not only me, but all the employers I sought to work for.

I now work with the firm of my choice, and I know it is the right fit. Pragmatically speaking I’m making a healthy salary. Plus I’m ecstatic to work with a team of people who share many of my visions and work diligently to make them real.

We did this together, Bree.

Thanks for standing by me all the while and encouraging me through every step.

Hesitation is Healthy

If you’re on the fence
for any of the following reasons,
JUST DON’T DO IT.

That’s right.

I’m warning you now:

if any of the following are an issue,
it isn’t gonna work out.

My approach is not to be seen as a treatment or intervention of any kind.
This work is unsuited for people who are under the influence of alcohol, or are actively hallucinating during sessions.
If your main relationship is unlikely to last 30 days, now is not the time.
If you start (or have started) dating someone within 30 days of the daylong sessions, that’ll nix your progress.
If you feel compelled to share information with me but are unwilling to do so over my routine means of communication (Zoom, Chrome, Gmail, or text) you’ll get all stressed out.

(I don’t need to know any secrets or your past, so if you must process aloud, you have the option to mute yourself and take your time. I get it.)
If you’re not comupter-savvy enough to, for example, navigate an in-browser app, this is not gonna work.

(It’s ready for you to explore today, if you’re curious. Free of charge!)

I don’t manipulate:

I’m not going to convince you or change your comfort-level with these pre-requisites.

They’re pre-requisites.
This is your heads-up.

On Crushes

A crush can be a helpful fantasy — a phase in finding love for yourself.

Just don’t mistake the real me for being open to come-ons, gifts, or activities beyond our written agreement: I’m not.

If you’re prone to crushing, or think that maybe, once you meet me, something like that might happen, we can address that first: I know some amazing people with great success in that realm.

I’d be happy to not just refer you (temporarily or otherwise) but actually help you get started with them.

That’s my no-wrong-door policy.

I AM NOT A THERAPIST.

Nowadays, Psychologists, Psychiatrists
and Social Workers
often have waitlists.

It's arguably a moral issue whether one should take up a slot with these particular professionals,
rather than leaving it available to someone else.

This is especially true if you're ready to pay out-of-pocket rather than submit to most insurances' prerequisite of a diagnosis,
or because you dislike being limited to scheduling 50-minute sessions during typical office hours.

(But by all means, I recommend therapy
if you have trauma to heal!)

$ Dismantle a
mood bomb

I guarantee you'll see results
when most facilitators can't guarantee anything at all...
4.5 months faster
No weekly performance anxiety.
No keeping your hopes up/down.
Just tangible, nearly-instantaneous relief.
at a fraction of the cost.
For comparable results, you pay other facilitators at least $95 for less than an hour. 4.3 sessions a month x 5 months = over $2,000. But with me, the whole trajectory is just $780, in three easy installments.

and remember: it's non-judgmental, present-tense, nurturing support... with lasting results.

Not everyone is game for a 2- or 3-day intensive.

I’m not out to ‘sell’ you on a cookie-cutter package. That’s just my best offer.

If your budget allows, those same results can be accomplished at a customized pace.

I recognise the precarious risk you take allowing yourself to believe relief is possible without experiencing it “yesterday.”

Right here, where you’re at right now…

Not daring to make a move…
wishing someome could just read your mind…

THAT’s the hardest place to be.

Living with live mood-bombs, it’s hard to schedule ANY activity without ‘psyching yourself up.’ Especially if you’re not even sure what state of mind you’ll be in when you wake up, right?

Unpredictable ups and downs can significantly cramp your style (or completely randomize it.)

Making appointments can be hard… and making promises you can’t keep threatens your integrity.

I GET IT.

So don’t.
Don’t promise anything.

Say it with me now:

there’s NO need to be

‘ready,’
hopeful, or
in a good mood

to meet me.

No need whatsoever.
I swear.

In fact, almost everyone who books these is privately furious (and secretly exhausted) from using all the ‘pep’ they can muster, just to function.

Come, come however you are.

My gift is in seeing your sheer brilliance, even if you yourself feel lost or ‘stupid’ — and witnessing loneliness without making you lonelier.

Why bother meeting?

To get specific about what I can guarantee you, personally, I’d have to hear you out on what exact results you’re looking for
and get a sense of where you, specifically, are at right now.

I don’t charge a dime for this part of the process.

And I don’t call it an “assessment” or an “introduction” or some other fancy name.

I call it what it is. It’s a

Zero-Pressure Sales Call,
part 1 of 2.

Zero Sales Pressure? –Really?

Really.

I’m actually curious, in a welcoming way, what it’s like to be you when a mood-bomb goes off.

(Yours, or someone else’s.)

No Fixing/Changing/Advising/Jeering/Cheering.

I listen.
I check that I’m following you exactly.
We get clear together.

About 20 minutes in, I invite a minute of ‘alone time.’

You can use that to notice whether you actually want to switch from talking about the past/present/problem, and tack on 10 minutes of talking about a possible future.

The 10 extra minutes (to total 30,) are not to make a sale. They’re to talk about what is for sale at all.

Together, we outline a possible future:

what realistic results might be for you,
what kind of time-line those are feasible on,
what exact result I can actually guarantee you in writing on the very short term.

I summarize it in an email.

No instant sales. You get to sleep on it, first.

If you like what I’ve offered you, you can request Sales Call part 2, where we

personalize agreements,
firm up the guarantee, and
put your liberation on the actual calendar.

Call #3, Orientation, includes a taste-test. It can be tacked on to call #2 if there’s time, or booked separately.

Talking to me is very safe for your wallet, and for you. Information-gathering doesn’t obligate you to follow through on anything!

I’m happy to refer you to free and/or relevant resources.

You don’t have to ‘stay stuck’ or ‘suck it up.’

This is your invitation to life...

If a sales call seems premature,
you can shoot me a private message
through this self-explanatory,
GDPR- and HIPAA-compliant app:

Registering grants you instant
access to a handful of self-directed assignments
to thoroughly prepare you for real traction
— with me or anyone else.

No download necessary.

Don’t believe me?
That’s healthy skepticism!

How ’bout you check out my take on
why smarts can be so isolating?

Simple email signup:

Rational Hearts

Conversation shouldn't be stressful

You're a Lover,
Not a Fighter

How to avoid arguments without avoiding your girlfriend?

Surely therapy isn't
the only kind of support out there...

For the first time,
you're not helpless.

Hesitation is Healthy

On Crushes

I don't talk to the women in your life.

I only care about your experience.

For self-diagnosed 'high-functioning,' highly technical guys, I have seen

results equivalent to
5 MONTHS of weekly sessions of any kind

IN JUST 2 DAYS of

This is your invitation to life...

Rational Hearts

You're a Lover, Not a Fighter

How to avoid arguments without avoiding your girlfriend?

Surely therapy isn't the only kind of support out there...

For the first time, you're not helpless.

Hesitation is Healthy

On Crushes

I don't talk to the women in your life.I only care about your experience.

For self-diagnosed 'high-functioning,' highly technical guys, I have seen results equivalent to 5 MONTHS of weekly sessions of any kindIN JUST 2 DAYS of

This is your invitation to life...

You're a Lover,
Not a Fighter

Surely therapy isn't
the only kind of support out there...

For the first time,
you're not helpless.

I don't talk to the women in your life.

I only care about your experience.

For self-diagnosed 'high-functioning,' highly technical guys, I have seen

results equivalent to
5 MONTHS of weekly sessions of any kind

IN JUST 2 DAYS of