You don’t want therapy.

You want what you signed up for
when your girlfriend moved in:

pleasure,
not pressure.

But if she’s like: “we need to talk.”

And you’re like: “we just did!”

It can’t last.

Whether you’re still together, or broken up, this is fact:

TALKING ABOUT TALKING

can feel circuitous,

like a trap.

Conversation shouldn't be stressful

You're a Lover,
Not a Fighter

How to avoid arguments without avoiding your girlfriend?

Do you need something to show her?
Proof you’re working on it
so she won’t label you “checked-out” or “tuned-out,”
and think you’re indifferent?

I suggest subscribing to my blog today
to show her you care.

To show her you hear her; you’re listening and responding.

So she’ll stop repeating herself.

So you can catch your breath and regroup.

It can be tempting to throw in the towel,

if the blame-game is not your style;

if you’re more of a
“just be chill and everything will fall into place”
kind of guy.

Why would the trust, the love, and the connection you once had
suddenly not cut it anymore?

Maybe relationships require
some kind of practice or skills
— skills you don’t want to learn from others,
but are no fun to learn the hard way.

You’re right to believe
it can just flow naturally.

If her strategy is to hire a couples counselor,
it’s because she obviously has no idea that, for you,
that might feel like performing in front of a live audience
whose Ph.D. you’re paying for by letting them talk-therapy you into

apologizing,
proclaiming your love repeatedly,
discussing stuff that feels unreal to you…

AS IF YOU HADN’T TRIED THAT YET.

NO, THANKS!

Since being natural and authentic is vital, central, and core to your ethic,
then opening yourself up to potentially unhelpful ‘help’ can feel

anxiety-provoking, which jinxes it bigtime,
cost-prohibitive,
overly risky,

and at some level, maybe even like

cheating at the game of life.

Again, I say:

You’re right to believe
it can just flow naturally.

You might tell your girlfriend:

Many couples’ therapists recommend
that both of you also get each your own
one-on-one support-person.

Question:
does yours have to be a
therapist?

If you’ve ever wished for a quick-and-painless,
lecture-free, fascinating, brilliance-unleashing non-therapy
designed by and for the Sherlock Holmes’ of the real world…

but assumed that option doesn’t exist…

this is your lucky day.

Do it once, and gain access to your own knowing ever after.

Even if you’re so averse to talking about emotions
that you’d rather describe objects’ relative speed
and position in space and time.

Hi, I’m Bree.

Almost 20 years ago, I met a brilliant non-therapist who proved, every single time he worked with someone, that their internal system always either had, or could regain, intrinsic health.

At the time, he described health as a sense of an inside, an outside, and an intelligent, permeable membrane between those, as well as a sense of desire, an accurate read of reality, and a way to bring those together — and having many sets of desiring insides, all in harmony with one another.

At the time, I was a Research Scientist studying cancer and immunology, myself. I was also so extremely averse to any trace of manipulation (still am) that, to this day, I’m sure his attitude of iminent health, and his particular approach to proving it, was the only way I could have accepted support:
as one Scientist challenging/assisting another in his quest for truth.

The approach was both deferential to me, the client, yet sturdy enough to feel truly safe — even without physical holding.

The benefits were immediately tangible to me, and everyone I knew proclaimed they’d never seen anyone become so much more themselves so suddenly. Acquaintances hardly recognized me from just a week before.

It is still, almost 20 years later, without a doubt, what set me free to be myself.

I’ve urged my mentor to train therapists long enough. I took Level 1 IFS training to join a somewhat relevant community of practice without having to become a therapist myself. I’ve organized myself intervision instead of supervision.

I refrain from certain things therapists are legally allowed to do, that I don’t want or need to do, anyways (e.g. talking about the past or interacting with people while they’re in certain vulnerable states of mind.) I don’t want or need that anyways.

I am uniquely equipped to support fellow skeptics in staying skeptical.

It’s highly effective.

Best of all, the fuller aliveness that follows isn’t a behavioral resolution. It’s optional:

you can choose to be more yourself, more capable, and more free than ever,
and, for however long you deem best,
consciously opt for your habitual response, if that’s what feels best in any given situation.

This is not
‘behavioral change.’

I’m no therapist.
Not a social worker, either.

Nor am I a trainer:
no rehearsing in front of the mirror.
No ‘tips and tricks.’

Being around people could suddenly become
far more interesting and rewarding…

That’d make life a lot less baffling, tedious, and scary…

It’d make all your goals easier to reach…

You could stop stressing about how exactly to
“just be yourself.”

I help technically inclined guys use existing strengths
to unleash new strengths.

Here’s how I work:

We start with a chronological description of your first-hand experience of what happens.

For example:
“When I get a woman’s number, I can’t bring myself to call it.”
“When my girlfriend’s mood suddenly changes, I’m baffled.”
“As soon as I get home, she’s talking — I’ve barely arrived!”
or
“Whenever I socialize, it takes me DAYS to recover.”

Then I ask for whetever specific, technical details you can remember
from your physiological experience.

I ask in manipulation-free, predictable ways.
You can focus on sensing your way through the same questions every time.

(You know it’s working because, at first,
the bad feeling actually starts to happen to you again, just a little bit.)
Except this time…

For the first time,
you're not helpless.

A mystery you couldn’t solve on your own, unravels:
the sensory feeling (which I call part of a “mood-bomb”)
proves to have been permanent, dormant, hidden, always there, lying in wait…

Always looking for its chance to detonate…

But this time, you have the exact kind of
neutral, scientific, exploratory attitude
and bomb-dismantling support you’ve needed

(instead of the usual, 100% understandable frustration.)

Now it can stop endangering your peace of mind!

All you have to do
is answer the same questions about your physiological experience
in a different order…
this time answering what you’d RATHER experience,
carefully toggling only one data-point — one dimension — at a time.

THIS CHANGES EVERYTHING.
LITERALLY.

If you take the whole next day after our daylong sessions,
and you truly relax and take care of yourself that day
and just transcribe the essence of your 9 Big Insights,
and
spend 5 painless minutes pouring over our notes every day for 9 weeks,
you’ll notice everywhere:

You’ve stopped fighting yourself.

With this inner cease-fire,
you taste what it’s like
to be your best, deepest self.

Best of all,
— and this is highly paradoxical —
the real-life situations that used to “set you off”
start to actually grant you access
to a calm, collected mindset.

You recognize who you’ve always been.

Life is less like a minefield
when there’s no more mood-bombs
lurking beneath the surface.

$ 780 Satisfaction guaranteed, or your money back.

Within just 48 hours:
Map your pain.
Melt it away.
Choose your own metrics. Start noticing change.
To help you dismantle a mood-bomb, you receive:
Immediate access to a system for direct-messaging me.
Prepwork to reassure you that this won't wreck your life's delicate balance.
Two free meetings to address your qualms and questions.
All for free.

Once you pay, you also get:
A care package via snail mail.
A thumbdrive to record our Zoom meetings on.
Two and a half days of my undivided attention.
Nine weeks of after-care calls on a bespoke cadence.
An app for integrating your 9 Big Discoveries in just 5 minutes/day.
Measurable improvement in your quality of life.
My 100% satisfaction guarantee on a specific result we define together before we even begin.

Will be
$990 in 2025

Thank you for offering such a valuable resource.

I'm very happy with how you assisted me with such positive change that has made a huge difference in my outlook and my ability to relax, be more content, and happy.

If someone were, like me, never able to have big groups of friends, tried Adderall, alcohol, and all kinds of therapy, but wasn't able to talk much or give the therapist much to work with, I'd recommend working with you.

My big "aha" moment was that it's the war with yourself that's damaging. You showed me my neuroplasticity. What we did in one weekend now allows me to pay a lot more attention to upset, fear, and other fight/flight reactions.

Since then, I've been able to be more comfortable with myself, and not bring myself down.

I'm not a broken person. That helps!

For a decade, I did not have close personal relations. It was like:

‘I don’t care! This is hopeless! Forget it!’

Well, it was a Hail Mary pass, but
this has been the HUGEST turn-around!

I’m such an introvert that people usually exhaust me. But it’s different with you.

With most people, I’m ready for a nap after about 10 minutes of conversation.
But an hour with you goes by so fast I don’t even notice time passing.

You’re funny, smart and wise, and so easy to talk to that I’m energized and not exhausted,
even when we talk about my least favourite topic: me!

I’m a big-bandwidth person, and so
I’m often afraid of overwhelming people.

What I appreciate about you, Bree, is that you are “big enough.”
I feel like I can be met by you.
You can meet me.

I can be as big, or as much, of “me” as I need to be, and you can meet me.

I don’t have to be nervous about “OMG, I have to say only 10% of who I am” for fear of overwhelming you.

I love talking with Bree. We’re very different people
– I’m introverted, shy, and sometimes shut down, and she can be very outgoing and outspoken –
and
she consistently meets our differences by communicating transparently about her own experience, inviting me to give her feedback and adapting to it, and actively and compassionately seeking to understand my experience.

Our meetings have provided me a rare opportunity to experimentally speak my full truth, which has been valuable practice that I have seen enrich my other relationships. It’s been a pleasure to learn and grow with her.

Bree, I offer tremendous thanks.

This book would not have happened without you.

I've had many past lives, but you...
You're from the future.

Your approach impressed not only me, but all the employers I sought to work for.

I now work with the firm of my choice, and I know it is the right fit. Pragmatically speaking I’m making a healthy salary. Plus I’m ecstatic to work with a team of people who share many of my visions and work diligently to make them real.

We did this together, Bree.

Thanks for standing by me all the while and encouraging me through every step.

Hesitation is Healthy

If you’re on the fence
for any of the following reasons,
JUST DON’T DO IT.

That’s right.

I’m warning you now:

if any of the following are an issue,
it isn’t gonna work out.

My approach is not to be seen as a treatment or intervention of any kind.
This work is unsuited for people who are under the influence of alcohol, or are actively hallucinating.
If your main relationship is unlikely to last 30 days, now is not the time.
If you start (or have started) dating someone within 30 days of the daylong sessions, that’ll nix your progress.
If you feel compelled to share information with me but are unwilling to do so over Zoom, Chrome, or in response to automated text reminders, you’ll get all stressed out:
those are my routine means of communication.

(You can mute yourself:
I don’t need to know any secrets or your past.)
If you’re not comupter-savvy enough to, for example, navigate an in-browser app, this is not gonna work.

(It’s ready for you to explore today, if you’re curious, free of charge.)

I don’t manipulate: I’m not going to convince you or change your comfort-level with these pre-requisites.

They’re pre-requisites.
This is your heads-up.

On Crushes

A crush can be a helpful fantasy — a phase in finding love for yourself.

Just don’t mistake the real me for being open to come-ons, gifts, or activities beyond our written agreement: I’m not.

If you’re prone to crushing, or think that maybe, once you meet me, something like that might happen, we can address that first: I know some amazing people with great success in that realm.

I’d be happy to not just refer you (temporarily or otherwise) but actually help you get started with them.

That’s my no-wrong-door policy.

I AM NOT A THERAPIST.

Nowadays, Psychologists, Psychiatrists
and Social Workers
often have waitlists.

It's arguably a moral issue whether one should take up a slot with these particular professionals,
rather than leaving it available to someone else.

This is especially true if you're ready to pay out-of-pocket rather than submit to most insurances' prerequisite of a diagnosis,
or because you dislike being limited to scheduling 50-minute sessions during typical office hours.

(But by all means, I recommend therapy
if you have trauma to heal!)

$ Dismantle a
mood bomb

I guarantee specific results
when most facilitators can't guarantee anything at all...
4.5 months faster
No weekly performance anxiety.
No keeping your hopes up/down.
Just tangible, nearly-instantaneous relief.
at a fraction of the cost.
For comparable results, you pay other facilitators at least $95 for less than an hour. 4.3 sessions a month x 5 months = over $2,000. But with me, the whole trajectory is just $780, in three easy installments.

Not everyone is game for a 2- or 3-day intensive.

I’m not out to ‘sell’ you on a cookie-cutter package, but the above does describe my best offer.

If your budget allows, those same results can be accomplished at a customized pace.

It’s tenuous to allow yourself to believe relief is possible without experiencing it “yesterday.”

Right here, where you’re at right now…

Not daring to make a move…
wishing someome could just read your mind…

THAT’s the hardest place to be.

Living with live mood-bombs, it’s hard to schedule ANY activity without ‘psyching yourself up.’ Especially if you’re not even sure what state of mind you’ll be in when you wake up, right?

Unpredictable ups and downs can significantly cramp your style (or completely randomize it.)

Making appointments can be hard… and making promises you can’t keep threatens your integrity.

I GET IT.

So don’t.
Don’t promise anything.

Say it with me now:

there’s NO need to be

‘ready,’
hopeful, or
in a good mood

to meet me.

No need whatsoever.
I swear.

In fact, almost everyone who books these is privately furious (and secretly exhausted) from using all the ‘pep’ they can muster, just to function.

Come, come however you are.

My gift is in seeing your sheer brilliance, even if you yourself feel lost or ‘stupid’ — and witnessing loneliness without making you lonelier.

Why bother meeting?

To get specific about what I can guarantee you, personally, I’d have to hear you out on what exact results you’re looking for
and get a sense of where you, specifically, are at right now.

I don’t charge a dime for this part of the process.

And I don’t call it an “assessment” or an “introduction” or some other fancy name.

I call it what it is. It’s a

Zero-Pressure Sales Call,
part 1 of 2.

Zero Sales Pressure? –Really?

Really.

I’m actually curious, in a welcoming way, what it’s like to be you when a mood-bomb goes off.

(Yours, or someone else’s.)

No Fixing/Changing/Advising/Jeering/Cheering.

I listen.
I check that I’m following you exactly.
We get clear together.

Less than 20 minutes in, I invite 1 minute of rest.

You can use that to notice whether you actually want to switch from talking about the past/present/problem, and tack on 10 minutes of talking about a possible future.

No instant sales. Sleep on it, first.

The 10 extra minutes (to total 30,) are not to make a sale. They’re to talk about what is for sale at all.

Together, we outline a possible future:

what realistic results might be for you,
what kind of time-line those are feasible on,
what exact result I can actually guarantee you in writing on the very short term.

If you like what I’ve offered you, you can request a second Sales Conversation. If you’re sure you want to move forward, we can even tack on the Orientation Call:

we discuss and finalize agreements,
schedule your liberation on the actual calendar,
and even get started, if there’s time.

Talking to me is very safe for your wallet, and for you. Information-gathering doesn’t obligate you to follow through on anything!

I’m happy to refer you to free and/or relevant resources.

You don’t have to ‘stay stuck’ or ‘suck it up.’

This is your invitation to life...

If a sales call seems premature,
you can shoot me a private message
through this self-explanatory,
GDPR- and HIPAA-compliant app:

Registering grants you instant
access to a handful of self-directed assignments
to thoroughly prepare you for real traction
— with me or anyone else.

No download necessary.

Don’t believe me?
That’s healthy skepticism!

How ’bout you check out my take on
why smarts can be so isolating?

Simple email signup:

Rational Hearts

Conversation shouldn't be stressful

You're a Lover,
Not a Fighter

How to avoid arguments without avoiding your girlfriend?

Question:
does yours have to be a
therapist?

For the first time,
you're not helpless.

Hesitation is Healthy

On Crushes

I don't talk to the women in your life.

I only care about your experience.

For self-diagnosed 'high-functioning,' highly technical guys, I have seen

results equivalent to
5 MONTHS of weekly sessions of any kind

IN JUST 2 DAYS of

This is your invitation to life...

Rational Hearts

You're a Lover, Not a Fighter

How to avoid arguments without avoiding your girlfriend?

Question: does yours have to be a therapist?

For the first time, you're not helpless.

Hesitation is Healthy

On Crushes

I don't talk to the women in your life.I only care about your experience.

For self-diagnosed 'high-functioning,' highly technical guys, I have seen results equivalent to 5 MONTHS of weekly sessions of any kindIN JUST 2 DAYS of

This is your invitation to life...

You're a Lover,
Not a Fighter

Question:
does yours have to be a
therapist?

For the first time,
you're not helpless.

I don't talk to the women in your life.

I only care about your experience.

For self-diagnosed 'high-functioning,' highly technical guys, I have seen

results equivalent to
5 MONTHS of weekly sessions of any kind

IN JUST 2 DAYS of